It was the first day of school, 6th grade band and my best friend and I were checking out the room for cute boys. Jamie and his best friend caught my eye and I mentioned it to her. It’s true I dated his best friend first and he dated mine, we were just kids. We eventually swapped and dated each other. He was funny, the class clown and he was so full of energetic life. Being so shy and reserved myself, I was really attracted to his energy. Our first kiss was after school at the front gateway among a hoard of other students pushing to get to their buses. We “dated” each other off and on through middle school. In 7th grade I started having a reoccurring dream about Jamie. I never told anybody until many years later for fear they would say I was just a foolish child. It was a vision of us married and to my 12-year-old self we were much older, I guessed in our thirties. I saw our general body shapes, we were taller, wider and I wasn’t sure Jamie had hair. We looked oddly different as adults and we had several children, although I can’t remember the exact amount it was more than three. In the vision our kids were also older, close in age, and they were all going to high school together. I could not see their faces even though after several of these dreams I seemed to be trying really hard; I wanted to know what our children would look like! Overall, the dream became a comfort to me in an extremely difficult time of abuse in my life; it became a beacon of secret hope for my future. The message was loud and clear: I HAD a future and it was a happy one.
In 8th grade and through the early parts of high school, I didn’t see Jamie much, but he lived closed to my grandparents house and would occasionally skateboard there to say hi and show off. I felt so calm in this secret knowledge that we would end up together one day when the time was right. And even though I had a serious boyfriend in high school and we did not share classes or the same social circles, Jamie and I had these intense moments between us throughout the halls between classes. We would both secretly follow each other taking the long routes around, just to be near each other for as many minutes as possible, never saying a word and only sometimes catching each other’s eyes. We thought it was our secret world, but eventually my boyfriend must have noticed the looks and felt our energy. It was loud enough that he pulled Jamie to the side one day and told him to stay away from me! I didn’t know this until a few years later and Jamie never was good at listening to orders…
Fast forward to 20 years later, we did marry and a lot of life was lived. Our 4 children were beginning 12th, 11th, 9th and 4th grades and they were posed in our driveway for the obligatory first day of school photo. I was stunned by the vision of them standing there; the dream came rushing back to me in an instant. I realized it had come true down to every detail, what we looked like…how happy we were. I immediately called Jamie and said, “You’re never going to believe what just happened, this is the year of the dream”! He knew exactly what I meant. It was a very profound moment of synchronicity.
The summer before 11th grade and my possessive, older boyfriend had graduated and gone off to boot camp when Jamie ran into my Mom at the local shopping plaza late in the night. She always loved Jamie and told him “that guy” was gone for the summer and to come rescue me. She gave him our new address, which was fairly close to his house. One day he showed up on his bike and we talked out in the apartment courtyard. He kept saying he wanted me and that I knew we were meant to be together. I acted like I didn’t know what he was talking about, but I knew and I also knew he was right. I felt some kind of honorable obligation to my boyfriend, so I initially fought it. But, as in all things regarding Jamie I was powerless to his loving demands. The simple lesson in this is your heart recognizes the truth whenever you hear it.
We spent the most amazing summer together swimming in the lake by our house and listening to music. At the end of the summer, I asked Jamie to give me some space to try to break up with the military boyfriend. As I mentioned, he was possessive and I was fearful of him stalking me and just not taking it well. I also told Jamie that under no circumstances was he to contact me until he was done with any affiliation to his neighborhood gang… That just wasn’t him and he had no business there and he needed the time to sort that out. It was a hard line for me. He also wasn’t attending school; but I knew his potential and that this was a case of “one step at a time.”
In the first months of 11th grade, I was still trying to figure out how to break up with that guy. I knew it was over for a long time, but I was very scared. One day at lunch Jamie’s best friend from middle school sat next to me and said he was under strict orders from Jamie to go to the school’s payphone and to put me on the line. This was pretty laughable at the time, 1- Jamie was too much of a jokester to be making “demands” and 2- His best friend who was still trying to “play” me was the one bringing it to me. After some negotiating I finally decided I needed to hear this. I remember his first words to me were “It’s time.” That might have been the first truly sincere, non-joking thing he’d ever said to me and in that moment I knew we would both move heaven and earth to make it work. He convinced me to drive to his house that day. I knew he was shooting pool and looking out the windows at my car sitting idle at the stop sign and I wanted him to come out and prove his words. He didn’t come outside, so I drove away without looking back. I was never one to make it easy for him…
Inseparable since 1990
Click here to read Jamie’s Story:
“Here is a little history of my life. At the age of 10, I met a girl who would someday be my wife; her name is Shannon. I knew from the moment that I laid my eyes upon her that we would share most of our lives together. This was my first experience with the divine connection, this feeling of knowing. It was a feeling of such strength there was no questioning it.“